are we a lost generation of our people;

i enjoy being a critical fan of my media but there's times where i find myself purposely looking for things to be upset about and it genuinely tires me out. it be way too much at times and can stop me from enjoying things for what they are.

everything's not a fight, i don't have to be defensive about things. i shouldn't be immediately defensive about things.

sometimes i just need to chill the fuck out.

a long time ago, about 2010-12, I used to make kpop gifs and edits on tumblr. i got very good at it, had a whole system and everything. then my laptop died and i lost all the software i used and i stopped participating in the kpop fandom in favor of the multifandom life. fastforward to the past 2 weeks and i've decided to get back into creating content. i have photoshop but i haven't found a screen recorder i like so i can't do gifs yet much to my chargin. and getting screencaps isn't easy with the keyboard capture either. but i'm doing what i can. it's just taking a long time to get used to things again, in addition to collecting textures and photos to use.

trying to do all of this on top of crafting headcanons and aus in a timely fashion is a bit overwhelming but i'm doing it to myself so can i really complain?